I’m going to assume that most of you already either know about and have probably even seen the viral break-up note that caught my attention only a few minutes ago. I am making that assumption because I always seem to be riding in the caboose on the information train. I only found out recently that “Ain’t nobody got time for that” was not, indeed, made up by my co-worker — it’s his charming response to my not-so-patient attitude about, well, just about everything. I was forced, as a result of discovering that he was quoting someone named “Sweet Brown”, whose viral video* is now over a year old, to reassess my co-worker’s cleverness. If, like me, these things elude your radar, I suggest you go here right now to view the break-up note — do not tarry! Because it’s hysterical.
Many things about the note had me LingOL, but the one that struck me as the funniest was the last one — “You Told Me: ‘Put on Something Sexy, We’re Going to Red Lobster'”. Putting aside for a moment that this would be my number one reason for breaking up with someone, as opposed to this person twentieth — it struck a chord with me. This is probably because I work in a moderately-priced theme restaurant myself and was just recently remarking on the get-ups I have the pleasure of observing on a daily basis.
I often wonder whether some of these people — the ones sporting stilettos and skin-tight minis — are on their way to someplace else — like their work at a strip club — or are they just the unwitting victims of a simple hoodwinking? Might they, in fact, have been led to believe that they were being taken to, say, a nightclub? Or a white trash wedding?
I have questions for the slovenly dressed, too. Questions that arise when considering this end of the spectrum include whether or not they were kidnapped while gardening or cleaning out the garage. I always hope that they were not fleeing a fire. I can’t seem to come up with any other reasonable explanation for why they had no time to change out of the ripped t-shirt, wrinkled pajama bottoms, and skeevy flip-flops prior to embarking on the journey that brought them to our door. Usually, based on the dirt beneath their fingernails, I just go ahead and put my money on yard work.
photo credit: overdressed woman
*If, like me, you missed the “Sweet Brown” video when it happened, you can just Google search it — one of many choices will be at your disposal! (I’d link you to one, but I read somewhere that she’s suing somebody for something and, God knows, “Ain’t nobody got time for that”!)