It’s going to be an interesting day. I lost my voice. That ought to make work fun! There’s bound to be more than a normal amount of grunting and gesturing. I may even be forced to hold up cards, like on “The Dating Game” — a Sharpie and some poster board might come in handy.
The worst part will be the folks who ask me, “Are you sick?” And then not believe me when I say I’m not. But, it’s true. I feel perfectly fine. And, outside of the hoarseness and the squeaking, I am fine. This malady is a result of either too much or not enough air conditioning. The combination of the humidity and the air conditioning wreaks havoc on my voice. It happens every year around this time.
I blame the weather. Last week it seemed like we were living on the surface of the sun — in a rain forest. It was that hot AND that humid. It felt like we were all part of some giant bowl of human soup. Then yesterday it got cold. Seriously. I was wearing a sweatshirt and pants. As a result, I lost my voice.
I may be able to get my night shift covered, but there is little to no chance that I can cover my lunch shift. While bartending without a voice will be difficult, running food/expediting in the kitchen will be damn near impossible — and that’s what I’m scheduled to do tonight. This job, much like motherhood, requires a fair bit of screaming. Unlike at home, where I only need to raise my voice in one language, my job entails yelling in two. I don’t claim to do it well, but I manage to make myself understood.
My Spanish is limited, though. And I can’t write it anymore — so, the poster board and the Sharpies will do me no good in this arena. I fear that tonight will require very advanced Charades skills — skills that I simply do not possess.
Lozenges my be my only hope.
photo credit: yelling