Something To Celebrate


NaBloPoMo14DayFourTonight we will celebrate — over a nice Italian dinner — what 25 years of marriage means to us, “Fang” and I. A milestone that in the modern world certainly bears marking — what with the divorce rate being what it is, somewhere, I think, in the neighborhood of 1 out of 3 marriages end in such a way. To me, that is a staggeringly sad statistic.

I take real comfort in the familiarity that is part and parcel of our long-term relationship. We have certainly weathered some storms, mostly that was my fault. Still, he stuck around. That says something about him and, I hope, about us.

We don’t talk about it much. We don’t waste our time or our energy on “State of the Relationship” discussions. We never have. We just move forward. We put the past in the past, live in the present, and try to plan for the future, “our” future, as best we can.

That it will be our future has never been a question. Even through the worst of times I don’t think it ever occurred to either of us to jump ship. We have always been in this thing for the long haul — for better or for worse.

We are, neither of us, perfect. We’ve done a few things right, though. One, in particular, comes to mind.

We had a very cute baby eighteen years ago, one that has grown into a lovely young woman. I have heard that you marry your opposite sex parent. She could do worse, far worse, than finding someone like her father to spend her life with. There exist only a handful of things that I can say with 100% certainty, that is one of them.

I hope that she has learned something about relationships by witnessing ours. Sure, we bicker, but we rarely fight. And when we do, we fight fairly and with respect. We don’t yell or throw things. More importantly, though, we never demean each other.

I think she’s lucky to have witnessed such a relationship. I know I was. My parents had, and still have, a similar one.

Perhaps the world needs to see more of this sort of thing. Our life wouldn’t make for a very interesting reality show. Still, I can’t help but think that if more folks made headlines for staying together, rather than tearing apart, the world might be a very different place.

I can’t worry about the rest of the world, though. It’s not my concern. I’ll just content myself with knowing that I did my part to demonstrate to my child that her father and I did not take lightly the promise that we made all those years ago to love, honor, and cherish each other. I don’t know about you, but I think that’s something to celebrate.

18 thoughts on “Something To Celebrate

  1. Carol Graham says:

    You are off to a good start! We celebrated our 25th. almost 25 years ago! You have the right attitude and that is what will get you through! So celebrate — you are leading a great example for your daughter.

    Like

  2. Louise says:

    Happy anniversary and congrats on 25 years!

    My parents are still happily married and my husbands were too until his dad passed away. I think there’s a lot to be said for modelling positive/healthy relationships.

    However, I’m fairly certain I married my mom, not my dad – so not sure I agree on that point :).

    Liked by 1 person

    • javaj240 says:

      LOL, I didn’t do the research — not my findings. It’s just something I remember hearing a few time.

      I, too, think there is a lot to be said for “modelling”.

      Thanks so much for reading 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Happy, happy anniversary. We celebrated our 25th last December. We head toward 26. There is so much to be said for supporting and being supported for 25 years. So glad that it has been good for you too.

    Liked by 1 person

    • javaj240 says:

      Thank you. We all take the good with the bad on some level, don’t we? But, at the end of the day the good in my relationship has far outweighed the bad. I’m sure I wouldn’t be celebrating 25 years if it hadn’t. Of course, I am lucky enough to be married to one of the most patient people on the planet. He’s tough to ruffle is old “Fang” 🙂

      Like

  4. Happy anniversary to you and Fang! Here’s to 25 more!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Very nice, well-written piece. Congratulations on 25 years of marriage!

    Your relationship is a testament to the ease with which it’s possible to tread in rough waters. I am sure it shows through your daughter, as well. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Happy anniversary to you both!

    After my mother died (3 years after my father), my sister made a comment in an email she sent out to me and our 7 siblings. It found its way into my head and my heart; “Disagree with some of their parenting techniques if you must, but they left us a legacy of love.” My father died months in advance of their 50th anniversary, but just as he and my mother did, I pray I leave my kids a legacy of love.

    Liked by 1 person

    • javaj240 says:

      I really do think that is one of the most important things you can leave your children. We may not be perfect, but we love each other — and, we forgive each other for our imperfections. Really.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Cathy says:

    Happy Anniversary to you and Fang. He is one lucky guy to have such a wonderful partner in life. Here is to 25+ more years together of happiness, good health and much joy. xo

    Like

  8. A real accomplishment in the world we live in. Congratulations!

    Like

  9. Cristina says:

    How lovely! Happy Anniversary!

    Like

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